Gunnersaurus vs Cyril The Swan coming to a ground near you soonish. It’s the bout of all bouts. Forget about the ‘Rumble in the Jungle’, poor old ancient Gunnersaurus is going to be quaking in his fossilised bones at the prospect of facing off to the notorious Cyril the Swan.
The 10th of September at the Emirates is the day of reckoning for our loveable dinosaur and I’m predicting some crazy antics from that mad Swan. I think he once beheaded a fellow mascot and kicked the stolen headwear into the goal, or something like that.
Of course, dinosaurs are known for their failure to adapt so let’s hope Gunnersaurus is on his guard. Otherwise, he could end up spitting out swan feathers after a Cyril attack.
Gunnersaurus got a fair amount of stick for not showing enough respect for the dead last year. It was a difficult choice to make for our fossilised friend. He had two choices: 1) disappear prompto or 2) join the players in the centre circle and show respect for the dearly departed. Our brave dinosaur elected to stay on the pitch and to cock his head sadly to one side to demonstrate his sadness. His decision backfired, unfortunately, but I’m sure he will learn from the experience despite his antiquated DNA.
However, I’m seriously worried that our meeting with Swansea could spell the end of the age of dinosaurs at the Emirates. So I hope everyone to whom that term applies is ready to adapt, as if they don’t they will only have themselves to blame if it all goes Jurassic pear-shaped.